I’ve come to realize that the most loving thing we can do for someone is to accept them — while the most unloving thing we can do is try to change them when they don’t want to change.
The work we have to do in our own spiritual practice is become the accepting, loving being who holds space for someone in whatever situation or transformation they’re currently in.
That may be hard when you’re in an intimate relationship with someone or when you expect something from someone, but acceptance is the answer. Watch the video and then read on to learn more.
Acceptance doesn’t mean that you let someone walk all over you. It doesn’t even necessarily mean that you cosign what someone is doing. It means you allow them to be where they are and you don’t try to change them.
Sometimes when we accept someone for who they are, all we can do is accept them and move on from our relationship with them. We can say, “I accept you and I honor you, but I can’t be a part of this.”
What acceptance does is resolve all judgment. It says that we’re willing to see this person in light and love, in the magnitude and truth of who they are, without having to judge their path. We trust that WHY they do these things that we might not love or understand comes from their own inner issues, adjustments to their egos, or their own fears, limitations and doubts.
We must trust and remember that we are all one. We all have struggles, and we have to accept that others have them as well. Accepting someone’s behaviors is an acceptance of their struggles and it honors where they are.
So I want you to start paying attention to people you may have been judging or attacking, and particularly the people you’ve been trying to change. Ground yourself in acceptance. Pray for acceptance — ask for it to be bestowed upon you.
As you begin to accept people for who they are, you’ll feel a sense of relief because you’re also letting yourself off the hook. When we try to change someone who doesn’t want to be changed, it just creates more resistance in our own lives and in our relationships.
And as I mentioned before, acceptance doesn’t mean you have to stick around. You can love and accept someone but leave the relationship for your own well-being. And that is fine, as long as it comes from a place of love and acceptance.
If you feel a lot of resistance around this concept, it’s likely that acceptance is greatly needed! So just pay attention to the ways that you resist the practice and how it feels when you open up to the concept.
The beauty of acceptance is that when you simply allow people to be who they are, they’re actually much more likely to grow and change as you create space for them to have the freedom to step into the greatness of who they truly are.
Whether you feel the resistance bubbling up or have been in great need of this practice, let me know how you’re feeling. I want to hear from you!
I hope this serves you.